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First night XC with instructor. The route was going to take us over my home at 11:00pm, so I turned on my aviation scanner in my home for my wife so I could tell her goodnight. As we passed over my home at 6,500', I had failed to push the flip-flop to the air-to-air frequency and was still on approach. ... Me: "Goodnight, Susan. I hope you sleep well." ... What I can only envision as a large, hairy-armed controller: "The name is Bart, and they like it a lot better if we stay awake." ... I apologized and changed to the air-to-air freq with my CFI laughing. -- Ed Bandy, via e-mail More

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San Marcos, Texas (KHYI) was busier than normal this recent November weekend due to Formula 1 racing in Austin when the following exchange was overheard: ... KHYI Tower: "Mooney 1234N, cleared for take-off, Runway 13." ... Mooney 1234N: "Tower, Mooney 1234N. Can I land first?" ... KHYI Tower: "Mooney 1234N, cleared to land." -- Robert Elliott, via e-mail More

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While on a local flight close to my base airport (KLWB), a landing Gulfstream contacted the tower. The controller in the cab gave the Gulfstream clearance to land, along with a warning that buzzards were circling near the approach end of the runway. "O.K.," replied the Gulfsteam. "We've got the BB gun loaded." -- Kyle Jones, via e-mail More

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Choppy conditions prevailed one recent evening along the Florida coast as we progressed toward Miami. We were behind several aircraft headed in the same direction when Miami Center told a Delta flight to slow to 260 knots in the descent. The exchange went something like this: ... Delta: "260 knots?" ... Miami Center: "Yes. The regional jet ahead of you has slowed." ... Delta: "Is he towing a banner?" -- Todd Mitton, via e-mail More

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Background: In the C-141 at the time, there was a three-position switch on the right side of the yoke. Up was interphone, neutral was off, and down was transmit on the active radio. And in a USAF "crew-served" aircraft, you identify yourself by position when responding to a question or checklist item. (I.e., "Ready for take-off?" "Pilot ready." "Co-pilot ready." Etc. In order of precedence: pilot, co-pilot, navigator, flight engineer, load master.) ... So: Many years ago, a new co-pilot (me) on his first operational MAC trip to Hawaii out of McChord Air Force Base had just finished the after-take-off-climb checklist and: ... Loadmaster: "Who wants coffee?" ... Pilot: "Pilot will take Black" ... Co-Pilot: "Co-pilot will take cream and sugar." ... ATC: "Seattle Center will take two black and one with sugar." ... Oops! -- James Patridge, via e-mail More

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I was flying from EWR-DFW the week after the Texas-Oklahoma University football game (won by Texas this year). On the center frequency, an aircraft with the call sign "Oklahoma One" checked in, and after each conversation with center, they responded "Oklahoma One." Finally, someone keyed the mic and said, "No, Texas won." The silence was deafening! -- Mark Castellani, via e-mail More

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While flying in the "northwest practice area" about 10 miles northwest of Columbus, Georgia listening to Atlanta Approach, I heard this exchange: ... ATL: "Piper 123, we have you as a PA-28, but your airspeed suggests otherwise." ... Piper 123: "No, we are a PA-34." ... ATL: "O.K. I'll update your plan to show you have an extra engine today." -- Chris Cook, via e-mail More

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The following takes place at a high-altitude sector with multiple air carrier aircraft: ... Pilot 1, apparently meaning to talk to the passengers: "This is the flight deck. Air traffic control has uhh " [unkeys] ... ATC: "Darn. I wanted to hear that." ... Pilot 2, cheerfully: "Yeah. He was gonna blame you!" -- Cheryl Bavister, via e-mail More

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Somewhere over Nevada, returning to Utah from San Jose: ... All the airliners where working hard to find their customers smooth air. There were sigmets for turbulence up to 14,000 feet and above 18,000. A UPS flight checked in on-level at 35,000 feet and asked: "What altitudes are working for smooth rides?" ... Controller: "There does not seem to be much smooth air, but it seems a little better above 38,000 and below 31,000. What would you like to do?" ... UPS Flight: "At our altitude, how long will we be in this light chop?" ... Controller: "Maybe ten minutes." ... UPS Flight: "I guess we will ride it out and see what happens. Controller, let me know." ... Then, from one to the other planes saying what most of us had been thinking: "What? Are those boxes complaining?" ... UPS came back and said simply: "No." -- Brad Brown, via e-mail More

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On Wednesday, September 11, 2013, while taxiing to show parking for this years Reno Air Races, we overheard another aircraft's communication with Reno Ground that went something like this: ... Learjet: "Reno Ground, Lear 12345. Request taxi to Atlantic's main office ramp." ... Ground: "Lear 12345, are you here for the races?" ... Learjet: "Affirmative." ... Ground: "Then you will have to go to show parking." ... Learjet: "I have specific instructions to go to the main ramp at Atlantic." ... Ground: "I'm sorry, sir, but you have to go to show parking." ... Learjet: "I have a VIP on board, and I need to go to Atlantic's ramp." ... Ground: "You cannot go to Atlantic's ramp. You have to go to air show parking." ... Learjet: "I have Bob Hoover on board, and I am instructed to deliver him to Atlantic's main office on their ramp." ... Ground: "You cannot go to Atlantic's ramp. You have to go to air show parking." ... Learjet: "Do you know who Bob Hoover is?" ... Ground: "No, I don't." ... Learjet: "Then get me somebody that does." ... At this point, we needed to shut down our aircraft, so we did not hear the remainder of the communication. But, rest assured, Bob Hoover was in fact at the Reno Air Races. -- Mike Hanson (via e-mail) More