John Baker

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Bakerisms

John Baker

Most of AOPA Pilot's December, 1990 issue was devoted to John Baker's retirement. Editor Mark Twombly's column featured "Bakerisms" -- John's unique combination of insight, humor and acerbic wit. With thanks to AOPA Pilot's Mark Twombly, Julie Summers Walker and AOPA's Communication Division, here's a baker's dozen of "Bakerisms."


Profile Speaking on the road on the subject of the nation's capitol and congress...

It's nice to be here. It's always a pleasure to get away from Washington, Disneyland East.

Washington is a funny place. At one end of town is the Congress and at the other end is National Zoo. It takes the visitors in town to tell us natives which is which.

When somebody refers to the mouth of the Potomac, they aren't talking about the river.

I'm pleased to be here. Don't take that as a high compliment. Coming from Washington, I'm happy to be damned near anywhere.

On AOPA...

AOPA members and pilots are not good ol' boys in baseball caps called "Ace" who fly around airports boring holes in the clouds.

The AOPA Political Action Committee is not a process under which we attempt to buy a politician. We don't want to buy them -- we just want to rent them.

In a speech to the chamber of commerce in Frederick, Maryland...

I was flattered by the invitation, of course, until one of my employees pointed out that Frederick county is a big dairy-farm community ... and maybe you're just looking for a lot of bull.

To a staff member struggling with a problem...

You're getting your underwear wrapped around the axle.

On his favorite federal agency...

The FAA folks always say "We're here to serve you." For those of you who are not laughing, ask your neighbor. Those of us who were brought up on a farm have another idea what service means.

Upon being interrupted by a departing airplane...

Someone has to do something about those damned noisy general aviation airplanes.

After coughing into the microphone...

Your fresh air is killing me. I come from the Reagan school of economics. Don't breathe anything you can't see.

Twenty minutes into a speech...

I'm going to talk until I think of something to say.