Heard at ILG (Wilmington, DE) on a Sunday. ILG is a training site for ATC, and also has very, very patient controllers.
Tower: Cherokee XYZ, let me explain how we do things. When I give you a clearance, you need to read it back so I know you understood.
Cherokee XYZ: OK, I understand.
Tower: OK, but you haven't read back the clearance.
Cherokee XYZ: Oh, I'm sorry.
Tower: No need to apologize, but I need you to read back Cherokee XYZ cleared touch and go, Runway niner.
Cherokee XYZ: Oh, I understand. I'm cleared.
Tower: I don't think you're understanding. When I clear you, I need you to read this back: "Cherokee XYZ is cleared touch and go, Runway niner."
Cherokee XYZ: OK, got it.
Tower: You haven't read it back, though!! Please read back.
Cherokee XYZ: Cherokee XYZ cleared to land, Runway niner.
Tower: If you want to do a full stop, I can clear that instead of a touch and go.
Cherokee XYZ: I'd prefer to do a touch and go, though.
Tower: OK, then you need to read back clearance for a touch and go. Let's try this one more time: Cherokee XYZ cleared touch and go, Runway niner.
Cherokee XYZ: Cherokee XYZ, Cleared touch and go, Runway niner.
Tower: Excellent! That was perfect.
I had to stop laughing before reporting in.
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