ATC: NABCD, after departure turn left heading 175 climb and maintain at or below 4,000, departure 125.9 and squawk XXXX.
Pilot: Any chance of a higher inital altitude?
ATC: We give you 4,000 in case of lost com.
Pilot: I know thats why I want higher.
"... on initial contact advise you have Ellington information Rudolph."
"A moment of silence everyone, for today we celebrate the 100th anniversary of the tow plane."
Unidentified pilot: Montgomery Ground, Cessna, er, Cessna ... wait ... who am I today?
I'll have to call you back.
Ground: Roger, call back when you know who you are.
Taxing back for a departure on Rwy 23 at Morristown (MMU), I noticed a group of 10 or so snow geese walking across the taxiway toward the runway. I paused for a moment and started to maneuver in behind the group of waterfowl. Then I heard ...
GROUND CONTROL: Cessna 123, those things are really a pain in the tail feathers.
ME: Some one is going to have to teach them a lesson.
GROUND: (refering to a Citation on short final) It looks like they are going to get that lesson.
UNIDENTIFIED: "Mmmm -- Pate!"
Cessna XXX: Philly approach, Cessna XXX with you at 4,500.
Philly Approach: Cessna XXX, Roger, Altimeter 30.69 and numerous targets in your vicinity.
Cessna XXX: Could you be more specific about the targets?
Philly Approach: OK, 12 o'clock, 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock, 3 o'clock, 4 o'clock, 5 o'clock - would you like me to continue?
Cessna XXX: Negative, we get the picture...
Tower: Cessna XXX, you said you were at taxiway Alpha One? Alpha Two?
Cessna XXX: Uh... We're holding at Alpha Three.
Tower: Right. One plus Two equals Three.
United XXX: LA Center, say again the frequency for United XXX. No answer on 133.4.
Center: United XXX, 133.4 is correct. Try again. If there's still no answer, come back up this frequency ... and I'll send somebody over there to smack the dirt out of their ears.
Controller: N123, is that airplane painted green?
Pilot: Uh, yes. ...Why?
Controller: Just checking our new color radar.