| by |
Rob Guglielmetti |
I
was scheduled for my private pilot checkride and everything was set. The
paperwork was in order, my instructor had signed everything he needed to sign
and the cleanest plane on the line had been reserved. I got myself to the
airport two hours early just in case, via the most circuitous means
imaginable, beginning with a New Jersey Transit bus through the Lincoln Tunnel
and ending with a sprint across four lanes of high-speed traffic and a
mile-long walk along an unpaved, mole-tunneled, grassy shoulder to the
Caldwell, N.J., airport. A journey of 15 miles as the crow flies takes the
better part of two hours. Who said air travel was expedient?
Shouldn't I Have Done This The Night Before?
Nevertheless, I'm early, I'm ready and I'm thinking about shooting a few
takeoffs and landings to calm my nerves before departing for Somerset Airport
to meet my fate and the designated executioner (DE), err, examiner. But first,
I need to check the logbooks for the aircraft I have scheduled. Everything is
looking good, but wait: don't transponders need to be checked every 24 months?
If I can't show the DE that the entry was made, then I can't prove the plane
is airworthy and then I can't do the checkride and ohmigod I need to
find the previous logbook. Where the heck is it and where is the A&P? He's
gotta help me find it ... and shouldn't I have done this the night
before?
No problem; I've still got an hour before I need to leave.
Two hours later, I'm preflighting another plane, one with proper paperwork,
and freaking out.
I Should Have Punted
I hastily depart, and arrive for my PPL checkride almost exactly two hours
late. What's that expression about first impressions? Nerves shot, I convince
the DE that he really wants to go through with this and that I'm ready. How
embarrassing would it be to show up at work tomorrow, everyone asking me how
it went? I'd to have to explain how I couldn't take the test because I
couldn't even get the paperwork straightened out. No, I want to do this right
now. Hindsight being 20-20, I now know I should have punted and come back to
fight another day.
Thankfully,
the oral exam goes well; I'd been cramming for it. With that out of the way,
it's on to the practical test.
Preflight complete and additional questions answered, we take off. Of
course, the DE drops his pen during the takeoff, obviously a thinly-veiled
ploy to "distract" me. I take it in stride and keep flying the
airplane, then at a safe altitude I help locate the pen, feeling like
Captain Al Haynes for about two seconds and then riddled with fear once again.
I'm afraid the DE is still annoyed with me for being late and ohmigod I
can't deal with failing this test. What happens then? I'll have to take the
test over! Isn't there a pink slip or something I mean, how embarrassing is
that?
As these thoughts are scurrying through what's left of my mind, here comes
and there goes my planned cruise altitude; caught that one just in time. So
far I've managed to keep the aircraft skating a razor's edge between the
boundaries of the PTS, but there's more to come. My nerves can't take too much
more of this.
So Far, So Good...
We fly the initial leg of the planned cross-country, eventually breaking it
off for maneuvers and hood work. Somewhere in the back of my head I know that
I have performed everything to this point within limits, and can confidently
stride into the office tomorrow wearing the white scarf and aviator goggles I
have purchased for the occasion. Again my nerves settle, if only briefly.
Simulated-instrument tasks completed, I remove the view-limiting device and I
now realize the man next to me is either some kind of genius or simply a
madman; after spending the last 10 minutes in one turn after another, staring
at nothing but whirling dials and digits, and still queasy from the unusual
attitude recoveries, he says, "Take me to the nearest airport."
I begin to attempt to quantify just how much of an idiot I am for arranging
a flight test with this man, to be conducted in an area different from my
local practice area. Short of anything more specific than "3,500 feet
above New Jersey," I have no idea where we are, but my training has at
least given me a decent aptitude for VOR use. I tune, identify and quickly fix
my position. I locate the Princeton, N.J., airport; "There's Princeton
Airport," I say, not at all convincingly. "Okay, take me there and
show me a short-field landing," intones the genius/madman in the right
seat.
Now, I've always hated short-field landings, and I'm still sweating bullets
from all of the preceding events, but I comply with his wishes because, after
all, he's running this show. We're a bit high, having just been doing airwork,
so I do some 360-degree spirals to lose altitude (at this point you should get
out your New York Sectional if you have one).
Here's
another thing I've always hated: letting the runway get out of sight once you
have acquired it. But alas, I'm too high, and must descend. So, about five
miles north of Princeton, I reduce power and commence a series of descending
spirals. Eventually, we arrive at an altitude suitable for entry into the
traffic pattern and I frantically scan the horizon for the airport.
Recognizing what appears to be a runway, I head for it like a moth to a porch
light. I look at my kneeboard, scouring the info I had written down at 5:00
a.m. that morning, review the CTAF frequency and the pattern altitude and, for
some reason, I note that there are car rentals available here. Announcing my
approach, pattern entry and lining up on downwind, I hear no complaints; no
one else is in the pattern. Glancing at the runway threshold, I see the number
25. Hmmm, that's odd. My kneeboard says Princeton's runway is aligned 10-28,
not 7-25.
Huh?
Again looking abeam the threshold, the runway number still stubbornly
appears to be composed of the numerals 2 and 5. I conclude I must have written
the number down wrong during my preflight planning. A glance to my right shows
a perfectly content DE, arms folded across his chest; he seems to be having a
good time.
I continue the approach. Turning base, I call on the CTAF. Turning final, I
call again. I execute a lousy short-field landing and turn off at the second
taxiway (the runway distance used should indicate just how bad it was). I
perform my after-landing checklist because one of the items on the PTS is how
well you use checklists no worries there, I do that quite well.
Of course, I used the checklist because I can't remember a thing at this
point and my nerves are shot. I think I just blew the checkride because that
was the first thing I really didn't do within the PTS and ohmigod how
can I tell anyone I failed the test?
What Next?
I turn to the DE, who ominously still has his arms folded across his chest,
and say, "Well, what do you want me to do next?"
He says, "Well, first off, I'd like you to tell me what airport we're
at."
With
my heart now firmly planted in the pit of my stomach, I immediately know what
I did wrong, and I want to get out of the plane, engine running, and lie down
on the runway for the next arrival: I had just executed a lousy short-field
landing at Central Jersey Regional Airport, 10 miles north of the airport at
which I was supposed to land.
Perhaps mercifully, the DE clears up any confusion and tells me that I have
in fact failed my checkride. I want to go home; I could walk from here. It
would only take a few hours at a good clip. He tells me to taxi to the
departure end of the runway and show him a short-field takeoff. I comply,
because I now figure I have nothing to lose. I nail the takeoff and proceed to
fly the remaining tasks with aplomb, including those ground reference
maneuvers that gave me fits all through my training. Isn't it interesting how
with nothing to lose I can perform the remaining tasks without a
problem?
After landing back at Somerset, the DE writes out a nice letter to my
instructor (who was taught by this same man to fly a few years back). It
reads: "Rob did a fine job other than landing at the wrong airport. Go
easy on him."
That letter is still in my possession. I will never forget that day, that
man or that sequence of events.
Aftermath
So, I failed. I did one of the dumbest things a pilot can do. But I
selected the day of my PPL checkride to have that lapse in judgment, and I
feel it's because I let peripheral concerns like passing and failing get in my
head while I should have been flying the aircraft.
My retest was with the same guy. He felt that since the rest of the flight
test went so well, I only needed to demonstrate "VFR nav
proficiency."
Well, guess what? The visibility on the retest day was three miles in haze.
You'd think I'd catch a break. My instructor had to fly with me to the DE's
airport, because the FBO wouldn't let me take the plane out solo in those
conditions. But with the DE as a passenger, I poked my way through the haze,
correctly identified some landmarks and airports and managed an okay
short-field landing to boot. At last I had secured the Private Pilot
Certificate.
Lessons Learned
You would not believe the number of people who have done what I did,
sometimes mistaking large, tower-controlled fields for the small airport they
were aiming for. You only find this out when you tell a pilot you have landed
at the wrong airport before, that you are a member of the fraternity. I am a
member, so I am privy to this exotic information. We do not wear jackets
emblazoned with membership insignia, so it takes time to ferret out all the
members at your local airport. Be patient, the stories are wildly
entertaining.
Everyone
has their list of lessons learned from the Private Pilot checkride. Here's
mine:
-
Your DG should concur with the rest of the approach plan. I had in fact
located Princeton airport that day, but after descending I desperately
searched the horizon for a runway, any runway. Unfortunately for me, the
first runway I spotted was five miles north of my position, not five miles
south, where Princeton was waiting for me. Had I backed up what I saw out
the window with a glance at the DG and the chart, I would have known to
simply keep turning another 180 degrees.
-
Relax. Your CFI will not send you on your way to meet a Designated
Examiner until he or she is confident you are more than ready to pass the
test. Remember, especially at a Part 61 school, that the CFI has almost as
much at stake as you do. Relax.
-
Trust your preflight planning, assuming you've done any. Had I trusted
my kneeboard, I would have known on downwind I was not in the right place,
and could have broken off the approach.
-
Local knowledge is a good thing; especially on a checkride, when you
have a lot of other things on your mind such as how good you will look
strolling in to the office the next day, wearing your white scarf and
clutching your temporary airman's certificate.
-
I own a GPS now and I'm surer than ever the airport I'm landing at is
the one I'm supposed to be landing at.
-
Lastly, fly the aircraft! Do not let distractions enter your mind before
or during your checkride. Nervousness is all well and good, but assuming
you're concentrating on the task at hand, that should all disappear when
you yell "clear prop."
Take it from me, if you're still thinking about white scarves and aviator
goggles during the unusual-attitude recovery, your head is in the wrong place.